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How can I co-parent with boundaries?

On Behalf of | May 12, 2021 | Family Law |

After a divorce, you may find yourself struggling to keep boundaries clear while sharing child custody. Your ex-spouse may take advantage of you financially or emotionally, and you both may get into endless arguments.

Stress and anxiety from this change may make you relax certain boundaries and ultimately cause more trouble later on. Being honest with your ex-spouse, as well as keeping a consistent schedule with your children, can help you stay focused and strong.

Plan ahead

According to Healthline, making sure to plan ahead for any holidays or special trips helps relieve tension. A while before the day itself, take time with your ex-spouse to discuss where the children should stay and for how long.

Write down specifics so that you have a list to refer to if your ex-spouse forgets what you both agreed upon. This can also be helpful to keep if he or she attempts to lie about what you both said.

Communicate briefly

Making sure to text or call with important information is a necessary part of child custody. However, you do not need to turn each short conversation into an hour-long discussion.

Leave a brief, concise message that does not blame or disrespect your ex-spouse. Keep the tone neutral and polite without coming across as too aggressive. This can help prevent arguments or misunderstandings before they begin.

Focus on the future

Letting go of prior arguments is one way to feel confident in your decision to set clear boundaries. Instead of focusing on past grievances, live in the present and remember that your children need your help and support.